[POETRY] Still He Loves Me
By Nikki Coco
He loves me
Out of fear
I offer nothing in return
Behind floodgates
Lie a thousand roses
He brings bliss
Boisterous laughter
At times when alone
I bellow in shame
I offer him nothing
Time and time again
Shackled and chained
By a past
Filled with love
Marred by pain
I have got to let it go
Must not let past define him
Must not let past define him
Must not let past define him
I remind myself
Time and time again
Yet still I offer nothing
He is himself
Totally different
Unlike the past
I tell myself
Love renewed
A sense of promise
Slowly emerging
From a distance
I see the light
Brandishing newfound hope
In my face
He brings me joy
I give him nothing
Time and time again
Afraid to reveal
That which I conceal
Tucked forcefully in the abyss
Of my love arena
My heartstrings he pulls
Captured by his rapture
It beats of a familiar tune
Passion and fury
Unrevealed
Kept hidden inside
Teeming with emotions
Poker-faced stares
Monotone vocals
Still
I give him nothing
Time and time again
Stuck dead in the tracks
A lover’s sorrow
I am not ready
I want to tell him
It is not his fault
That matters little
Still he loves me
In spite of the fact
I give him nothing
Time and time again
In love he trusts
For he knows
That in time
It will be revealed
It too was he
Who was loved
The whole time
To live and to love
Is to reveal
Our deepest truths
Our hearts’ stories
In hopes that we too
Will be loved
Time and time again
In love we trust
To someday uncover
That we were lovers all along
‘Til death do us part
Nikki Coco is a Greater Toronto Area resident. A self-proclaimed ardent lover, when she’s not busy writing, or taking care of her babies, you’ll likely catch her in search of Zen by way of dancing the night away, reading voraciously, or scoping out the latest in news, the arts, and cultural criticism via social media. You can find her on Twitter: @artculturemusic
The Ride or Die Project 
Leave a Reply