Exploring the stories of women who live by a ride-or-die philosophy

[POETRY] Still He Loves Me

By Nikki Coco

He loves me

Out of fear

I offer nothing in return

Behind floodgates

Lie a thousand roses

He brings bliss

Boisterous laughter

At times when alone

I bellow in shame

I offer him nothing

Time and time again

Shackled and chained

By a past

Filled with love

Marred by pain

I have got to let it go

Must not let past define him

Must not let past define him

Must not let past define him

I remind myself

Time and time again

Yet still I offer nothing

He is himself

Totally different

Unlike the past

I tell myself

Love renewed

A sense of promise

Slowly emerging

From a distance

I see the light

Brandishing newfound hope

In my face

He brings me joy

I give him nothing

Time and time again

Afraid to reveal

That which I conceal

Tucked forcefully in the abyss

Of my love arena

My heartstrings he pulls

Captured by his rapture

It beats of a familiar tune

Passion and fury


Kept hidden inside

Teeming with emotions

Poker-faced stares

Monotone vocals


I give him nothing

Time and time again

Stuck dead in the tracks

A lover’s sorrow

I am not ready

I want to tell him

It is not his fault

That matters little

Still he loves me

In spite of the fact

I give him nothing

Time and time again

In love he trusts

For he knows

That in time

It will be revealed

It too was he

Who was loved

The whole time

To live and to love

Is to reveal

Our deepest truths

Our hearts’ stories

In hopes that we too

Will be loved

Time and time again

In love we trust

To someday uncover

That we were lovers all along

‘Til death do us part

NikkiNikki Coco is a Greater Toronto Area resident. A self-proclaimed ardent lover, when she’s not busy writing, or taking care of her babies, you’ll likely catch her in search of Zen by way of dancing the night away, reading voraciously, or scoping out the latest in news, the arts, and cultural criticism via social media. You can find her on Twitter: @artculturemusic

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